Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Letters to the industry 2

Not the article I was planning on doing. That should be available for your viewing displeasure tomorrow. As for now, try to enjoy this.

To: Sega
Subject: Sword-swinging hedgehogs


So, I saw the scans and details regarding Sonic and the Black Knight. It looks like you're really putting some effort into the content of this game, and I really appreciate that. The problem, though, is the premise... Sonic with a sword? He's the fastest thing alive, people! He needs no weapon but his insane speed and agility!

I will admit that the game looks fun, possibly even more so than Unleashed, but still... Sonic with a sword? What's next, NiGHTS wielding a crowbar Gordon Freeman-style? Actually, that might be kinda cool...

The point is, I really don't believe hedgehogs and weaponry mix all too well. Need I mention Shadow the Hedgehog? Didn't think so, as I'm sure it's permanently stapled to your cubicle wall with the words "NEVER AGAIN" scrawled on it in blood.

To: Nintendo
Subject: Mario is Missing


So, I'm really excited for Animal Crossing: City Folk and Wii Sports: Resort, but... Where's the main man gone? Not a single game with Mario in it has been released since Dr. Mario Online Rx, and after Super Sluggers, the big guy's future looks pretty barren. I'm very surprised to not see any word on another New Super Mario Bros., or even the next Mario Party. What's the deal?

Of course, I'm not at all considering you'd abandon a character as iconic as Mario, but it's just so incredibly weird to not have any word at all on more than one upcoming title with the pudgy plumber in it. Well, at least Wario Land: The Shake Dimension looks solid. Sure, it's not Mario, but it will still be a blast, I'm sure.

PS: What happened to Disaster: Day of Crisis? If I hear that's been canceled, I'm sending Weegee after you!

To: Electronic Arts
Subject: This is Spore-ta!


I've been a big fan of the Spore idea ever since I first heard of it, and I can hardly wait to get my hands on the final copy. However, I also have a few concerns to voice.

One, please don't bombard us with tonnes of add-on discs right out of the gate. That sort of thing may fly with Sims 2, but when it comes to Spore, please leave well enough alone. Well, unless one of the discs includes a "Blocks penis-headed animals", in which case I'd be camping out for it.

Second, if Will Wright wants to delay it, let him! I know this isn't a concern of any sort right now, but I'm just tossing that out there in case a situation like this arises in the future. If Will says it needs more time, give it more time. Do not question The Will Wright!

Alright, so I guess that's all that truly needs to be said about Spore. One minor note on a slightly different topic, though: Please just give the Wii real sports games, and not this "All Play" crap. I applaud you for trying, of course, but... Wait, were you even trying?

To: Nintendo EAD
Subject: Animal Crossing: City Folk


Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you

PS: Thank you

To: Readers
Subject: Guess what?


You can discuss this article on the forums if you please. Or the comment section, too, if that's more your style.

The Duck Has Spoken.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

To: PsychoDuck
Subject: RE: Guess what?

[[You can discuss this article on the forums if you please. Or the comment section, too, if that's more your style.]]

No thanks... whoops guess I kinda went against myself there. Anyways nice article. You should do more of these. Later.